This classic scene from the musical Fiddler on The Roof was about as much as I knew about matchmakers growing up…
Tzeitel: But Mama, the men she finds. The last one was so old and he was bald. He had no hair.
Golde: A poor girl without a dowry can’t be so particular. You want hair, marry a monkey.
Now in an age of technology and endless apps and swiping left or right, it seems only fitting that that we go back to the oldest, most traditional way of finding a husband or wife. The matchmaker. Meet Julia Bendis. Ever since high school she would ask people if they were single and put them together—“I just knew I had an instinct and a gift!” Matchmaking is becoming more common and a trusted way of finding a partner in life, versus online dating or meeting randomly at bars/restaurants or through friends. People (myself included) are getting tired of being disappointed after a horrible date with someone they met online who said they have big ambitions (when in actuality their only ambition was to finish the entire pint of ice cream). Most people want that personal touch- it’s like looking for a needle in a haystack. You won’t know if you have chemistry until you sit across from the person and actually converse. “You can’t teach someone what I do—either you have it in you or you don’t. I have a feeling about who would be great for you. I have to meet you in person—see your posture, facial expressions, body language, look you in the eye, etc. I will ask the hard questions in the very beginning,” said Bendis.
How much does something like this cost you might ask? (Wait that’s actually me asking for myself) She works with everyone’s budget and tailors different packages based on the individual’s yearly salary. Her rates are extremely reasonable compared to other people in this business. When I asked her what her process is like she had this to say, “After many years of doing this… I have set up a great process. My database is full! You go to my website and the first step is a sign-up form with all the questions, then I ask you to send a couple recent photos. The only way I will take you on is if I think I have a potential match. We finally meet and then I go to work. I don’t show pictures. This is something that sets me apart—I don’t think it’s a good idea. One part is intuition and the second part is giving people what they want in a partner.” With every new client, she gets to know them on a personal level; their needs, wants, and desires for their future mate. Where do I sign up?
For more information please visit matchbyjulia.com.
Tanya Schwied graduated from New York University, studied abroad in Israel, and currently works for the CEO and President of Jewish Federation & Family Services.